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Have you noticed that two people can endure the same kind of suffering and react completely differently? For example, an employer can issue department-wide layoffs, and one employee will spend their time applying for other positions, catching up on much-needed rest, and connecting with their loved ones while another can become extremely depressed and drink themselves into poverty, homelessness, and possibly an early grave. Why do these individuals cope so differently from one another? In this post, we’ll explore one possibility — their temperament.
What is temperament?
Is temperament simply the nature of a person? According to Psychology and You, temperament is a person’s mode of emotional response. Temperament describes inherited differences in behavior and is present from birth. In my opinion, it’s not simply a case of nature, but nature versus nurture. If people repeatedly reject a person’s temperament, they may find another, not necessarily better, way to behave. In the same way, when people accept a person’s temperament, they’ll continue to behave in that way, even if it’s not healthy or mature.
While modern psychologists don’t widely accept personality theories, personality tests are a decent starting point for understanding why we cope the way we do or interact with others in general. Of course, an online test could never encompass your entire being, but it can give you insight into your behavior. Personality tests can also be helpful if you’re unsure of which career field you want to pursue.
What is the Myer Briggs Type Indicator?
There are two major personality tests I will describe today: the Myer Briggs Type Indicator, or MBTI, which Carl Jung’s personality theory inspired, and the four temperaments test, which philosophers have pondered for centuries. The MBTI tests an individual based on four different categories: how they interact with and respond to the outside world (extraversion vs. introversion), gather information from it (sensing vs. intuition), make decisions (thinking vs. feeling), and the rigidity of those decisions (judging vs. perceiving). The graphic below describes each of these categories. There are sixteen possible personality types that can come from the Myer Briggs type indicator.
On the other hand, there are only four temperaments. These temperaments are sanguine, phlegmatic, choleric, and melancholic. I will describe the personality types that correspond to these four temperaments; the other twelve are a combination of two temperaments. For example, I’m an INFJ, which is a melancholic-phlegmatic temperament.
Source: "Do What You Are: Discover the Perfect Career for You Through the Secrets of Personality Type" by Paul D. Tieger, Barbara Barron, Kelly Tieger
How are temperament and personality type related?
The sanguine temperament, or ESFP personality type, are lively, optimistic, carefree, risk-taking, pleasure-seeking, and creative individuals. Next, the phlegmatic temperament, or INFP personality type, are loyal, passive, altruistic, nurturing, caring, and kind. People with a choleric temperament, or ENTJ personality type, are goal-oriented, analytical, strong-willed, bold, intellectual, and usually work in a STEM career. Finally, those with a melancholic temperament, or ISTJ personality type, are reliable, orderly, traditional, practical, and best suited for administrative roles.
As a quick side note, humans are complex. Most of our characteristics fall on a spectrum and are highly dependent upon the situation. For example, as an IntrovertediNtuitiveFeelingJudging personality type, when I’m with my close loved ones, I can be extroverted and spontaneous. Don’t be boxed in by labels; this post is meant to be speculative, not definitive.
Now that we’ve described a few personality types, let’s explore the possible ways to cope with suffering, and which types are more likely to use which defense mechanisms.
What are defense mechanisms?
Defense mechanisms are a way in which people distance themselves from the full awareness of unpleasant thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Defense mechanisms are mainly learned behaviors acquired from parents and other significant loved ones during childhood. Thanks to this post by John M. Grohol, Psy.D., I was able to cobble together the most common defense mechanisms.
Repression is the process of pushing a painful thought or event out of consciousness; also known as suppression. Repression of abuse allows you to survive the trauma in the short-term, but the original problems continue to have an effect; they even fester and grow.
Dissociation is a more intense form of compartmentalization.
Dissociation is the act of disconnecting from thoughts, feelings, memories, or even a sense of identity. While dissociation is a defense mechanism, it also has the possibility to become a serious disorder.
Compartmentalization, or cognitive dissonance, is a defense mechanism in which the person separates parts of themselves from awareness of other parts of themselves; these divided parts behave with separate sets of values. For example, a religious person with an addiction has to isolate themselves from their spiritual beliefs in order to use without feeling extremely guilty.
Undoing is the attempt to take back an unconscious behavior or thought that is unacceptable or hurtful. Compensation is the act of counterbalancing perceived weaknesses by emphasizing strengths in other areas. Compensation can be viewed as simply having awareness of what you can and can’t do; however, it’s crucial not to overcompensate.
Denial is refusing to admit that there’s a problem. Routinely denying doing and saying things causes trouble; people may see you as untrustworthy, dishonest, and unaccountable for your actions. Denial is slightly worse than repression. Accountability, awareness, and acceptance promote growth and are the only way to begin healing. Hold yourself and others accountable or problems will persist.
Displacement and projection are closely linked.
Displacement is the act of venting your feelings on something or someone other than the true or original target. Displacing anger on innocent bystanders can unnecessarily hurt the people you care about. This defense mechanism can sever relationships and the initial problem remains unsolved. Projection is similar to displacement, however, instead of lashing out on innocent people, you blame others for your thoughts and behaviors. This defense mechanism shows a lack of accountability for your role in the issue.
Intellectualization is the act of removing any emotional response from a situation and being objective. Refusing to express, face, and deal with emotions gives them more power, but at some point, you do have to stop allowing them to interfere with your life. It’s crucial to learn the lesson and move on.
Intellectualization and rationalization both remove all emotion from the equation, and try to use logic to explain a problem away.
Rationalization is the attempt to explain a problem away in order to absolve yourself of guilt or accountability. Rationalization is yet another defense mechanism in which a person refuses to accept the role they played. An example of rationalization is when a person cheats and they justify their actions by saying they felt lonely or *insert excuse here.* While they could’ve easily brought their feelings of loneliness to their partner’s attention or LEFT the relationship before seeking attention from someone else, they explain away their disloyalty by blaming it on the lack of love they felt from their partner.
Regression is going backward in behavior and thought processes to a period when you were taken care of as a child. This behavior includes pouting, tantrums, and sulking. While the individual portraying this behavior may initially be offered comfort, continuous childish behavior can lead to rejection. However, some people may not be regressing, as they have no other way to deal with their emotions. Many people, especially those that have experienced childhood trauma may have developmental delays, specifically dealing with emotion regulation.
How do the different temperaments cope with adversity?
As I said earlier, this is a speculative post, so these are just my assumptions of how each temperament is likely to cope. Individuals with a sanguine temperament may be more likely to regress in order to get their way, compensate for their weaknesses, deny any wrongdoing, or even project their negative thoughts and behaviors onto others. Because of their carefree nature, they probably prefer to absolve themselves of any guilt.
Due to their people-pleasing character, people with a phlegmatic temperament may try their best to think and act in a positive and acceptable manner at all times. On the other hand, those with a choleric temperament will try to rationalize, intellectualize, and justify their behaviors, and may even displace their feelings. Finally, individuals with a melancholic temperament are likely to avoid, repress, and compartmentalize any thoughts, behaviors, and issues that conflict with their traditional values.
What are some healthy ways to cope?
While defense mechanisms are learned, it’s possible to unlearn them. We can’t control everything that happens to us, but we can learn to control our reactions. It’s defeating to say “that’s just the way I am.” If you realize that the way you cope with stressful situations is unhealthy, you should do something about it.
Here are two healthy and mature defense mechanisms. Assertiveness is the emphasis of a person’s needs or thoughts in a manner that is respectful, direct, and firm. With this defense mechanism, you aren’t projecting your thoughts and feelings onto anyone else or absolving yourself of accountability for meeting your own needs. Assertiveness is the only healthy way to deal with confrontation. Sublimation is the act of channeling emotional energy into constructive or creative activities. For example, someone with the tendency to get angry may engage in physical activity in order to vent their frustrations without harming anyone.
What is REBT?
If you struggle with reacting to situations in an emotionally healthy way, maybe you should consider a therapist that specializes in rational emotive behavior therapy or REBT. Albert Ellis is the founder of REBT. The basic belief is that we learn irrational beliefs from significant others during childhood and recreate these irrational beliefs throughout our lifetime. We reinforce self-defeating beliefs through autosuggestion and self-repetition and then behave in ways that are consistent with these beliefs. The major goal of REBT is to encourage clients to be less emotionally reactive.
A significant tenet of REBT is the ABC framework, which describes how our emotional and behavioral consequences are actually a product of the irrational beliefs we have about events, not the events themselves. REBT teaches clients how to dispute irrational beliefs by detecting, debating, and discriminating against them.
Temperament is only one of the many reasons why we cope the way we do.
Hi! Which defense mechanism is the most common for you to use? Has this post changed your outlook on it? Please feel free to comment below. We’d love to hear your thoughts! Thank you in advance for sharing.
About the Author: Gabrielle Harrington, Founder and CEO of HeadHeartS0ul
Gabrielle Harrington is a blogger, author, and mental health advocate. Through her book, blog, and social media posts, she provides a realistic approach to personal development, healing from trauma, and building mutually beneficial relationships with others. Although she's still deep within her own healing journey, her mission is to help people reach healing and wholeness for themselves. Her words touch s0uls.
For information on the author click on the following link: Gabrielle Harrington.
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